Sabina Nessa

The murder of Sabina Nessa is another thread in an all too familiar pattern of women being murdered by men while going about their daily lives. Women and girls are not safe and this has been the case for a very long time. Over time society has adopted norms that make it tolerable for men to murder women and feel able to get away with justifying their actions. Whether it is the French notion of ‘crime of passion’, the murder defence of “violent sex”, or the implication that rape victims somehow did something to provoke their assailants; society finds a way to make violence against women reasonable under certain circumstances. The truth is that males need to learn to respect the rights, choices and bodies of women.

Violent urges are primeval but over time the desire for social acceptance has restrained people from wantonly resorting to it. Unfortunately we are at a point where men seem to feel that giving in to violent urges is liberating and empowering. There are too many instances of people resorting to violence to resolve personal differences. It has become common to find people on social media threatening violence against strangers whom they might be having a difference of opinion with. Social media personalities have taken to promoting and organising boxing matches as a way of amping up rivalries. The US experiences of minorities subjected to violent police interventions have been disturbing and disruptive. And recently the increasing exposure of violent assaults by U.K. law enforcement officers has spotlighted a very worrying trend. 

As a society we need to address and change the culture of violence against women that has become entrenched in our lives. We should be able to rely on law enforcement and government institutions to recognise the dangerous trends and actively work to combat them. Talking about it isn’t enough. Not enough is being done and women are paying the price for this negligence. Keeping women safe is not about finding protectors, it’s about stopping perpetrators. 

Manning Up

Black people face a lot of challenges in today’s world. Advancing themselves and uplifting their communities while dealing with personal demands and institutional prejudice place quite a strain on individuals. Tragically Black males have been frequently known to get involved in criminality, drugs and gender based violence. This comes out of a culture of toxic masculinity that has normalised both misogynistic and anti-social behaviour.

It needs to be acknowledged that too many young Black males are overly invested in living out a ‘gangsta’ fantasy. It is so bad that a majority of them are so committed to it that they can’t see any reason why it isn’t a viable life choice. If you add the lack of any real ambition outside of making quick money, and toxic masculinity to the equation; we are now dealing with a young underclass that cannot see the potential of a big blue sky and instead is settling for a hole in the ground. 

The double whammy of materialism and violence has had a detrimental effect on Black families and women. Not only is the behaviour of Black males devastating domestic family life, it is also tearing apart the community fabric that Black people have been so dependent on for survival. This is not to say that there aren’t negative external pressures that are hurting the Black society. Racism, poverty, discrimination, unemployment, low educational achievement are equally problematic. However Black males have become an issue that we can no longer ignore. 

The corruption of the Black male psyche is a generational issue that has created an endemic problem. It is difficult to expect more when the individuals have very little self worth and awareness. If all they value are material things and machismo then by adulthood we are being left with too many lost causes. The numbers of Black men not in education or employment, involved in the criminal justice system or who have a history of abuse and violence speak for themselves. 

There aren’t any miracle cures for the problem but families have a responsibility to instil good values in their youth. The Black community also needs to do a better job of promoting wholesome role models. People who know the harm that systemic racism has been doing but are still committed to improving themselves and the people around them. Being a better man is not about being a superstar it’s about supporting yourself and those people you come into contact with.