I remember a few years ago when I was about to do some traveling an uncle of mine who I had gone to notify decided to advise me of what to expect on my travels. He told me how it was going to be tough, probably like nothing I had experienced before. That's because conditions in Nigeria were so agreeable most Nigerians had become soft and lazy. He said this with a very pitying look in his eyes. He rounded up by giving me a hard stare and wishing me good luck if I still wanted to travel. My guess was this was his way of telling I was feckless and wouldn't really amount to much. Now I don't know whether he was wrong or right. But I do know I did not find his words either encouraging or inspiring. They didn't do me much good but I certainly never forgot them. Because while they may have been factually accurate they certainly weren't very supportive of me. But he had to have his say, so screw me; he thought.
Nigeria being a very hierarchical society we are practically required to seek the counsel of elders. And then we're duty bound to abide by it. This can be a good thing, as a Yoruba proverb points out; "a child can never have as many rags as an elderly person". It is true that wisdom comes with age and experience. However it is true that not all aged people have actually devoted themselves to the pursuit of wisdom, nor have they experienced everything the world has to offer. So there are times you have to figure out when the 'advice' you're being given is really just so much hot air.
As with these words I have written, all advice should be taken with a reasonable degree of scepticism. Who knows where the motivation for the advice truly comes from? Ultimately you must know what you want for anyone to capably guide and direct you. If you haven't figured out what your options are, there is a good chance that the good advice you get will only lead further down the path of confusion.
